Thursday, January 15, 2009

This innocent little car almost hit my Scooby!
First, good news: Wife's out of the hospital, the 31-year old Atari 2600 is still in the trunk of my car, and I no longer have a penchant for assassinating Pedophiles. Breathing deep (sigh) I almost got into an accident while driving home tonight. I swear to fuck it wasn't my fault.
I'm in the right hand lane, in a lane that is for right turns only. There are cars on my left which are forced to go straight. In a millisecond I see this white smart car PULL into my lane while he was parallel to me - and no signal! I honk the horn and jerk the car to the right a little bit (but I can't go far - there's a curb!). Fortunately the fool in the white smart car pulls back and realizes THIS LANE ISN'T EMPTY BITCH!

For those that don't know, this intersection is notorious for people that don't signal when they change lanes. Like tonight, before I almost got into the accident (which wouldn't have been my fault) - some old dipshit in a CHEVY AVEO cut into my lane in FRONT of me WITHOUT signalling.

I can't take this shit. I hit the brights and dim them. I see an opportunity - the left lane is open and I gun the motherfucker. The car races ahead of EVERYONE in the right hand lane. While passing the piece of shit AVEO I see it's being driven by some old 80 year old man who doesn't even notice my glaring grimace of evil.

I scoot the Scooby into the right lane doing 90 and quickly slow down using a gear down.

Screw these motherfucker asshole idiot drivers.

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